She Creates: Marianne sprangers

For almost 30 Years, Marianne had an idea to pair her bad dating stories with her amazing cheesecake Recipes. She finally cooked up her perfect book.

“I don’t hate men. If I did, I wouldn’t continue to date them. I’d stop dipping into the dating pool and definitely stop looking for my happily ever after. I actually love men. I just happen to love cheesecake a little more.”

—Marianne Sprangers. 

When I first met Marianne Sprangers, I had no idea she had a fabulously funny book hidden in her head—well actually, a mostly finished manuscript. I knew her as a talented artist so the fact that she wrote as well came as a surprise. Marianne gave me an early copy of her manuscript and I curled up in my favorite chair with some tea to begin reading and one page in, I snorted some of that tea through my nose. Marianne was funny. Her book was funny. It made me laugh and made me want to run into my kitchen to try one of her cheesecake recipes that are included (on theme) at the end of every chapter.

It was a really good book but the sad truth about publishing is that you can write a really good book and still not get a publisher. Book publishing is a business and businesses need to make money. So if you are not already a household name and you don’t have 50,000 Instagram followers, your chances of getting a book contract are pretty slim. Marianne had already figured this out by the time she came to a workshop I was teaching on Self-Publishing.

Marianne tells me she left that workshop encouraged and ready to finally get her words in the world. She had thought about this book for almost thirty years but finally committed to seeing it published in 2022. Marianne officially published her book in October 2022 and it promptly hit the #1 in New Releases on Amazon for Humorous Cookbooks (who knew that was a category?).

After years of writing, Marianne is navigating the world as a new author and has a book signing at Park Road Books on February 15, 2023 7pm— go get your copy signed and give this new author some love: )

Support you locally owned book store if you can or you can buy Marianne’s book here

Below is an interview with Marianne— Eight Questions with author Marianne Sprangers. It’s about a 6 minute read and well worth it because as I mentioned, she is funny but also wise. If you are looking for encouragement to follow your dream, Marianne has some great encourgament and inspiration.

-Kathy

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With a full time job, how did you make time to write?

Shel Silverstein wrote a poem about Melinda Mae, the little girl who sat at a table with a fork and napkin, facing the task of eating an entire whale. It felt impossible, but slowly and with one bite at a time, she did it. 

Originally, before I started actually writing, I thought I could knock this thing out with a week-long vacation, a bottle of wine, and an ink well with a feather in it. I didn’t realize the size of this enterprise or how many times my cat would lay across my keyboard, disrupting, editing and often erasing the work just completed. 

At first, I’d try to set out large blocks of time. I was full of hope and ambition. “A chapter a weekend!” I’d tell myself. When I sat down to write in this state, however, I’d freeze. The mind just went blank. So, I’d stop, do something else, and then completely drain myself of all of that good energy needed for writing.

Eventually I landed on the fork-and-napkin method, working in small bits.  20-minute increments, to be exact. It might seem odd, but everyone has a method that will work best for them. This was what worked for me. After a long day at work, laundry to be done, and mouths to feed, 20 minutes felt do-able and it put a bit of deadline pressure into my brain which, for some, can spark creative flow. I’d set aside 20 minutes a day to write.  Somedays it was only five minutes. Some days it turned into an hour. In the end, I finished the whale.  

How long were you writing it?

In my head I have been writing this book for about 30 years.  It took me roughly 26 of those years before I was brave enough to put pen to paper … and even then, the feelings of overwhelm and inadequacy had me embracing distractions such as dusting or freeing the yard of dog-matter as though they were 9-1-1 emergencies.  It took me four years to go from the first day of writing “I can’t do this” 100 times in my journal to reach the “look what I did!” stage of publishing. Without the distractions, the writing probably would have taken a few weeks if I had a roll of duct tape for that nagging inner critic.

Have you always thought you would write a book?

Yes. I also always thought I’d be an actress on Broadway, grow to my dream height of 5’10”, and date George Clooney at least once before deciding he had some insurmountable flaw, too. I’ve always wanted to write, but I didn’t know where to begin or how to do it in earnest, so I put it in the clouds for later. 

Later came when a friend of mine, an author, sat me down in a coffee shop and asked me to write out all the ideas for books that I had in my head. By the second or third napkin I had been scribbling on, she had me stop and circled “Cheesecake is Better Than Men”. That was the title at that time. She said, “This one. This will be your first one.” And then, like a good friend does, she held me accountable for actually doing it, checking in each week for progress and offering to read what I wrote. I can’t tell you how many times the dog suddenly ate my homework, but my friend was patient, and the first rough draft was complete after about 18 months. 

Now I’m hooked. 

What was the “last straw date” that made you say—yes this is going in my book!?

When I first began writing the book—I mean actually writing and not just thinking about doing it when the arthritis in my fingers actually glues the pen to my grasp—I had just exited a relationship. As shocking as that sounded, it was true. He didn’t want me writing the book and actually had the audacity to say that. But that’s not the moment I’m going to talk about. That’s just the moment things ended. After a while, and some contemplation, I had decided that it was time to put myself out there again. I signed up for a dating app. I went on date after date after date after date. Almost all of them were ending with the thanks-but-no-thanks and please-delete-my-number well wishes and handshakes. It was so disappointing. (see chapter 27). The divorcee, the bookstore guy, the unmotivated guy…date after date. The final straw was the scone guy (see chapter 7). I had quite literally put these dates to prayer, asking why-oh-why was I meeting what were clearly the wrong men for me? And I got my answer: They are for the book. The answer was that although I was the one on these dates, the experiences I was having were almost certainly not unique to me. I had to write about them because I was certain that other women were having the same dating experiences. I mean, really—who says they are open minded and then chastises a scone for having butter in it? Sheesh. 

Are these dating experiences all Charlotte men where you live now or from many locations?

I’d love to blame Charlotte for being the capitol of Dates-Gone-Wrong, but that would be unfair to all the other places with sub-par attempts at Happily-Ever-After. I lived in Wisconsin for a portion of my adult and dating life and used to genuinely think that my experiences were influenced by what type of grass the cows had been grazing on. Then I dated someone from Michigan and another in DC. Then I moved to Charlotte. I don’t think it had anything to do with the grass. 

What is your favorite recipe? 

All of them. It’s so hard to decide!! When I first started gathering recipes for the book, I only had a few that were my own. My plan was to fill in the recipes needed for the book with ones that were given to me over time, but it turns out that copyrights are an actual thing. I love to bake and have been doing so since putting mud-filled pie tins in the oven at four-years old. My recipes have changed a bit and I no long pull from the sod, thank goodness. Interestingly, I met with a local chef to discuss flavor combinations that would complement the stories. I wanted to create some recipes that were more ‘masculine’ in flavor. The chef, a man, suggested a sauteed onion cheesecake. No kidding. He said sauteed onions turn sweet and that would be a masculine, yet sweet flavor. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather go back to mudpies than try an onion cheesecake. I thought about a flavor that would resemble plaid flannel and came up with the red velvet cheesecake (p.135). I thought about what a man-box might taste like and came up with the beer and pretzel recipe (p.64).

Playing with flavor combinations and creating new recipes was so much fun! I made over 200 cheesecakes in about a year’s time. Some went to work, others to neighbors, and a few went to the racoons. The recipes that worked out best went into the book.

What is the biggest fear you had about writing?

Writing is such a vulnerable thing to do. The fears are found in failure, imposter syndrome, not feeling good enough, judgement, judgement, and more judgement. 

I believe that these fears are universal which is why so many people struggle to write that first book. It’s terrifying! I wanted everyone to buy it but no one to read it because I was just waiting for the horrible reviews. 

So far, the reviews are all outstanding and I’ve had no regrets about anyone reading what I’ve written. Even my mom says she likes the book, so it seems that the biggest hurdles/fears are behind me. 

What advice could you give to someone who is hoping to write a book?

1.    Phone a friend. Find someone, whether a friend, a writing coach, a writer’s group, or whomever who will hold you accountable for words on a page. My friend and I would even make ludicrous bets and treaties such as “if you don’t get this chapter done by this date, you will have to make a larger donation than you are comfortable in giving to an organization that goes against your own beliefs.” As crazy as it was to agree to this, it was just the impetus I needed to not only finish one chapter, but to finish several because there was no way I was going against my values. 

2.    Open your gift. It’s for you. I believe that the creative ideas we have are gifts from God, and that if we don’t open this gift and use it the way it was intended that we won’t receive any more gifts. They will go to someone else. 

3.    Write it out.  Pen to paper, write it out. Jot it down. Eventually you will transfer it to your computer and edit the bejeepers out of it close to umpteen times because that’s just what writer’s do. Even if you begin each chapter with “I don’t know what this chapter is about but I’m going to write something today anyway,” that’s okay. You can edit that part out later. Or leave it because that could be a funny way to start every chapter in a book.  

Marianne Sprangers was born in Wisconsin’s udder territory, where she excelled in pastimes such as shivering and being cold. Not long ago, Sprangers relocated to North Carolina, where she thawed enough to let her pen hit the paper, writing her first book Cheesecake Loves My Thighs. Learn more www.mariannesprangers.com

Kathy Izard is the founder of Women | Faith & Story (www.womenfaithstory.com) and the award-winning author of three books. Her first memoir The Hundred Story Home released in 2016, received a Christopher Award for outstanding inspirational nonfiction. In 2019, she created a children’s book, A Good Night for Mr. Coleman with artist Evelyn Henson, encouraging kids to dream big and do good. Her new memoir, The Last Ordinary Hour, is now available in ebook, audiobook, and paperback through your favorite booksellers. Kathy’s work has been featured on NPR as well as the Today Show inspiring people to be changemakers in their communities. Learn more www.kathyizard.com.